Confessions of a Squirrel Killer

Well, suspected squirrel killer, I should say. No bodies have been found, but there is some suspicion that I may have been involved in the demise of a few of our furry friends. Recently, our kitchen was enduring the beginnings of an ant invasion. I knew I had to act quickly before the ants were actually able to locate a food source. I returned from a shopping outing armed with ant bait and, in an attempt to keep my children from ingesting ant poison, I put the traps outside our door, between the door and screen, right in the middle of the ants' path. I thought my plan was genius - it would easily thwart the ants, be out of reach of my kiddos, and remain secure. The screen door doesn't actually latch shut, but it also doesn't properly fit in the door frame, so its rather difficult to open and I didn't really consider the lack of latch to be of particular concern. Then a wind storm hit. In the middle of the night I got up to investigate the incessant banging that kept interrupting my sleep, only to find the screen door was partially open and banging in the wind. Once I pulled it shut (still unlatched though), quiet returned. But I did realize the bait was gone. Hmmm...wind? Did the squirrels actively seek it out? I don't really know the answers to these questions, but I did find a disassembled bait housing in the driveway the next morning. Yikes. I'm so sorry little friends. At least this didn't coincide with the pumpkin wars. The motives.... no one would believe it was an accident.